More random thinkings

It has been awhile since I've been "home alone" and had a chance to loose LeeLee for more than a moment or two so here's some thoughts the girl's been having.

I've read in several places the benefits of breast massage for increasing and toning the breast.  Being a big girl I've always had some breasts and I have spent several weeks massaging them to see what might happen.  It actually does seem to be having some effect.  When I dressed up today I am filling my bra better even without the breast forms.  When I "push up" there is more fullness.  What I've often tried to hide with poor posture, I am now enjoying and standing tall to admire.

I enjoy making jewelry.  I also enjoy wearing it when I have the chance.  I have made myself several necklaces that I can wear in guy mode and I've also made some just for LeeLee.  I ponder sometimes if my inclination to crossdress and display my feminine self is why I enjoy the creating of jewelry, cooking, buying shoes, etc. or if my enjoyment of these so called feminine pursuits has led me to the desire to crossdress.  It's a variation on the chicken and the egg debate which I won't pursue but will ponder on occasion.

So much for random thinkings.  Here's a picture of one of my recent designs.  I think it looks great on me.

Happy Halloween!!!

Make it last all weekend!

Kisses All!!!

Decided to do some self-portraits today and to show off some of the turquoise jewelry I made.

For the Very First Time

When I first began this journey I blogged that I had no desire to pass in public and that a safe haven to explore was my only desire.  That is largely true even today but recently I have had a compelling desire to take LeeLee into public but inconspicuously.  This plan began to take shape as I planned for a visit to my mentor and encourager Mistress S.  I was going to be home alone for about an hour before I needed to leave and I felt that I could actually do this.

This morning was LeeLee's debut.  Butterflies don't begin to describe what was going on inside as I began dressing.  The makeup went on pretty well - nothing fancy today and definitely no mascara to glob on me.  If you've heard people say their heart was pounding, that is where I was at by the time I got to the lipstick.  Maybe the tympani solo in the 1812 Overture would be more fitting!  Trembling hands were in there too.  Twice I was sure I could clean me up and put on my guy clothes and still get there in time.  But I persisted - wig, black knee highs, jeans, slip-on wedges and an off-white tunic.  LeeLee was in the house, dressed and looking pretty good but she had to get her butt out of the house now.

Opening the front door (no one in sight) and trying to walk casually to the driveway seemed easy enough since my heart was still beating in cut time to pace me.  OK, that's good so far, but drive out of the neighborhood the back way where no one would recognize the car if they happened to be out.  So far, so good I think, I'm on the highway now.  But wait, the cars and trucks are going to pass me!!  EEK!!! I thinks.  Judiciously varying my speed as they pass by and learning that hair twirling can be useful in remaining undercover I make it into town.

CRAP!!  Stoplights and construction traffic merges and people walking by only a few feet away.  Twirl the hair some more - careful don't pull the wig off.  WHEW!! There's a parking place right near the door to Mistress's building.  WHOOPS, she's not quite ready and it's raining and there are 3 contractor guys loading pallets into Volvos.  Twirl hair, pull down the visor, put on some more lipgloss, twirl hair.  Finally they pull away.  Mistress appears at the door (in very cool pink knee socks which I'd love to have)  and I casually power walk across the street to safety!

All in all an incredible montage of exhilaration, terror and satisfaction.  What a rush!!!  Still I'm not not looking to pass, just sneak by! :)

Random Thoughts

Last week I had a few hours alone and got to try on a new outfit - black sweater, red and black houndstooth skirt, black textured hose and some new shoes (there's a picture on the sidebar of these) with 4 inch heels.  I did look pretty fine IMHO.  The shoes were great and I didn't fall or stumble.  I'm proud of me as I'm usually clumsy in taller heels.

I got some beard concealer (Ben Nye) from an Amazon.com makeup store.  It works pretty well as a foundation base.

I'm going to see Mistress S in a few days.  I'm thinking about donning wig and a tunic top over jeans and driving there en femme.  It's a little scary especially if parking is bad but the urge may win out.  I've never been in public in my female persona so I'd like to try sometime.  Hopefully there will be a parking place near her building's door.  I'll post later and tell what happened.

A Cautionary Tale

I came to a point a couple of weeks ago where I decided that chest hair was not aesthetically pleasing sticking out of lingerie.  I have been wearing opaque briefers which include the bra and covered down to the crotch. This hid man hair except on the upper chest.  Waxing did not appeal to me so I tried shaving the area.  That worked well except to my surprise I had a chest full of stubble the next day.  I had no idea that chest hair grew that quickly.

I decided to try a hair remover and since my skin tends to be rather sensitive, I did a little research and bought one that promised to be gentle.  I followed the directions carefully and about 10 minutes after the application of the cream, I wiped off the hair.  Wow, smooth, nice!!

I showered and when I dried off, my chest was a little red.  OK, thinks me, that's probably normal and it will be fine in the morning.  In the morning I ran my hand over the area before I got up and was pleased to find no stubble.  When I got to the mirror, I was startled to see that my chest was indeed smooth like a baby's bottom - a baby with a serious case of diaper rash.  I was covered with a red rash over the entire area that I had treated the night before.  No hair just red and itchy!!!

The itch went away after 2 days of allergy ointments and the rash died down to a cluster of red bumps after 2 more days.  The bumps cleared up in about a week about the same time the stubble returned.

Better living through chemistry - NOT!!!

Ahh

Alone at last and LeeLee's loose around the house.  Getting fixed up all the way is more fun than I could have imagined a few months ago.  I've had time to try out some new looks.  I even got my eyes looking pretty good IMHO.  Gave myself a manicure too.  Very nice morning!!!

I think that my skin care regimen that I've adopted for the past couple of months has done well and my makeup really goes on smoother and looks better.  I even seem to notice improvement in my under eye wrinkles.  The skin is definitely smoother and better looking with and without makeup.

All in all this has been a fine, fine day.